A lifetime is not a long time.
We like to think of our lives as never ending but life has a way of showing us how foolish we are to hold these notions.
You are the CEO of your own life and, as such, have responsibility for it and the choices you make.
You can be meek or powerful . . . either choice is fine. Make it unconsciously, rather than unconsciously, whichever one it is.
Live it full out, not at 50% of your potential.
Have you ever had a job where you put up with mistreatment for too long? I know I have. Have you?
I worked for a search firm some years ago where one of my co-workers read emails sent to others and the owner took resumes that were faxed into the firm that were intended for the recruiting staff. They stole fees that others should have gotten and wondered why their employees and co-workers were not motivated.
I didn’t want to change jobs then because I was successful and didn’t want to start over again with another firm or start my own search firm. Eventually, I couldn’t look the other way at how the owner misbehaved or how he tolerated lunacy in the office and left.
A different but equally insane environment existed at the next firm I was associated with. Without going into detail, there was a class system in place where the longer tenured workers were allowed to run roughshod over newer ones; you needed to be accepted by one of the old guard in order to be able to able to become “made” (it was a bit like the mob in that no one could challenge someone who was ‘made’).
Such “sacrifices” or “accommodations” aren’t necessary and, in fact, are counterproductive to your growth and success. Management may refer to such sacrifices as a being “a team player;” think of it as being an abuse victim to someone else’s perpetration.
What does it matter any way?
What I found for myself is that when I tolerate things that are intolerable, they drain energy from me and, I suspect, do from you, too. People complain about the person who eats their lunch from the office refrigerator, moves chairs around to take theirs and a host of other offenses . . . and rightly so. They have been perpetrated against and even when the offense is small, it starts to become one of many that eats away at their core.
As such, whether what you are tolerating is a simple as having inadequate resources to do your job, or a co-worker who is taking candy or pens from your desk, it is something that you need to address in one of two ways—zap it or leave it.
What does “zapping it” mean?
The dictionary definition of “zap” is “to attack, kill or destroy as with a sudden bombardment.”
Thus , in one of the instances I mentioned, I could have gone to the agency owner who stole a resume that was faxed to me and said, “I just got a call from someone who faxed their resume to me and wondered why you called them. Give me the resume.”
I would then have listened to the lie about there being no cover letter, ignored it and had the satisfaction of confronting a bully.
I didn’t do that.
When I was being treated as an outsider being “conned” by co-workers, I could have confronted one of them and asked, “Why the BS? Why do you feel compelled to lie to me about something so obvious?” Would I have crossed a line with that person? You bet! But what difference would it make? If management backed them up or said something that translated into, “you could have done it differently instead of being so disagreeable,” I could have responded, “Where have you been for two years until I challenged them?”
Ultimately, I left both situations later any way because the perpetrations built up over time and caused me to no longer be able to ignore them . . . and that is what usually happens to people . . . they are no longer able to ignore the “workplace violence” constantly eating at them in the form of promotions passed over, “politics” getting in the way of making the right decision, small raises being given as “good enough” and a host of other things.
If you are uncomfortable confronting people, it is easy to go to the second option . . . prepare to leave.
Get your resume ready, start practicing how to interview, joinJobSearchCoachingHQ.com and learn what you don’t know about job hunting, activate your current network of relationships and add to them and get yourself the heck out.
I remember a workshop I attended some years ago where the facilitator asked an attendee something to the affect of, “How are you in your relationships? How are you at work”
“I am 100% in at both places half the time; the rest of the time, I’m not there.”
“So you’re a 50% guy, huh?”
Don’t live “half in” because you are putting up with things you can change.
After all, with many of you in fields where job openings abound, you have choices in your field . . . at least until the next recession starts. You can take advantage of the options that are available without kowtowing to craziness.
You are the CEO of your life.
How do you want to live it between now and its inevitable conclusion?
© The Big Game Hunter, Inc. Asheville, NC 2016
Do you really think employers are trying to help you? You already know you can’t trust recruiters—they tell as they think you need to know to take the job they after representing so they collect their payday.
Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter has been a career coach and recruiter for what seems like one hundred years.
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