The Box and The Buffet (VIDEO)


People try to define people based upon nonsense and fantasy. Here I try to encourage you to break out of the limitations but not fill your plate so fully that you get nothing done.

Summary

call this video, "The Box and The Buffet;" you'll understand why in a minute. I've done a previous video called, "The Box" about the conditioning that we receive from the time that we are small. It's about the conditioning of the school system in the workforce that tries to define us in particular ways.

For example, in the school system, we are told, "shut up. Do what you're told. Regurgitate a bunch of stuff or elseā€¦" It progresses to, "or else you will get into a good school." "Or else you'll get a good job." Eventually, you get a good job and one day you're fired. Even though you did good work and wonder whether that's all there is.

The box also goes on in different ways. It goes on and is part perpetuated by people and their expectations of you. For example, if I sent to you (I'll use my own experience and my old profession of recruiting as an example), there's a certain expectation attitude that people have when they hear the term "recruiter." If I describe someone is being Italian or Irish or black or Latino or a programmer or an accountant or a developer, they live in a particular place that is either a place for other less successful people or more successful people live in, on and on and on. We attach certain expectations onto people based upon nonsense. I can only call it that because we don't know the person.

We start to assume that they are poorly educated. We start to assume that they behave in certain ways. Even though we know nothing about them. I want to encourage you (1) not to take this stuff on and to be yourself with all your loudness or quietness, to be "multi-passionate" if that is how you feel . Sometimes people have the expectation (I use another stereotype here) that the programmer will be a certain personality type and may instead be "loud and boisterous," or love to cook. They possess all these different qualities that are different than what people's expectations are of them. Like someone being Irish, and something else. Black and something else. Don't take it on! I want to wake some of you up and point out that you put these labels onto people, but these expectations onto people based upon pure fantasy on your part. On the other hand, for individuals,

On the other hand, for individuals, there is the example of the buffet. Once you start to rebel from some of the stereotypes that are being templated on to you to make it convenient for others but where they don't see you, I want to encourage you that, like at the buffet, you take on as much on your plate as you can actually eat. Not to try to do so much that you are unsuccessful at all of it by your definition. One thing I do know is that a glutton becomes beyond satiated. A plate with so much food that you can't eat it becomes unpleasant because you feel unfulfilled.

I want to encourage you to have all your passions and work on them and enjoy them but not take on so many of them that you take on too many of them and accomplish none of them. Sometimes, that will take coaching to support you with that.

Some of us, myself included, have lots of different passions and things that we enjoy and things that float our boat. Sometimes I need to slow myself down and get encouragement to do that or also take on so much that I get nothing done.

Bring a coach into your life. Let me help you... Or pick someone else.

Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter is a coach who worked in recruiting for what seems like one hundred years. He is the head coach for JobSearchCoachingHQ.com and NoBSCoachingAdvice.com

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